An IDIOT Mouse in An IDIOT World

I shall be telling this with a cry

Of seeing angriness glued to the glimmering in each eyes
Somewhere 16 years hither and hence
Estimating my financial growth in the Kingdom
I chose to tell the lie & truth on my work place

I have filled in my last letter to boss
I've phone 'till my line caught fire
And I turned my wheel of memory
To the past risks of Ethic policy,

I remember every body Sighed,
Yearning for quill pens and papers
when the customer is in front
and computers had never been thought of
whereas now they rule alone.

Only a host of broken promises
That haunted then in-trays then
Took note, as they lay, of the last chance
To arrange the affairs of customers

'Is there anybody there?' said the customer
banging on the office front door
But no-one there descended to the customer
No head to raise from the keyboard,
Took heed of the phone, or the door knock
By computers all were fazed.
And a phone started up in the office
above the client's head
And he knock upon the door again, a second time
'Is there anybody there?' he said.

The poor client looking at the moving time, morning to the noon
Reading the big letters written in banner,
Integrity and ethical tone of employees
Staring & Mocking at the empty chairs
And thinking of the office timing
The poor client sensed impotence of work place
though his heart sank in unhappy,
And wandered, down the empty hall and disappeared
Like an idiot mouse in an idiot world,
I also chuckled with an idiot look
Stared at the idiot computer
Thinking of the banners of Integrity & Ethical tone
Yearned again for quill pen and paper

MY HOUSE IS DARK

My house is dark
My house is dark.
I like it that way.
Through unshaded windows
I look across the street.
People there have lights on.
I see them through windows.
A muscular young man
Cutting the hair of a child
My apartment is dark

Some top hats eating
in nearby restaurant,
A woman drinks water
Nearby super market,
On the top floor
Some are dancing in
In the blue light of TV.
A mom, a daughter:
Chatting with next door women
three without men.
At the bottom floor an old couple
Smothers with fear
Of who will die first.
My house is dark

Too many times
I have said the same things.
I watch here in darkness,
In the peace of aloneness,
And think about me,
And think about the world
Beneath my sad disguise.
While I am near mad
Wish this poem were pixie dust
To throw into the street
My house is dark

                             Azad

SILENT TEARS

My Soul, yesterday, deserted me,
It flow away to the other end
I pursue to come back
But, I faint, I dim, I fail to find

And at last I astonish seeing my soul
Sobbing near remains of Girl ,
My heart beat up, realizing holes of gun barrel
shaping her empty stomach filled with fire
her eyes widely opened stone-still
seems how she ardor the elegance world
not with knowing its barbarity
with widely opened Jaws
with starving eyes, and stomach

I look at the sky- it was dark
I look at the sun – it was black
I look at the rainbow – it was colorless
I look at the grass field – It was dried-up
I look at the sea,- It was parched

Sobbing near her, my soul cast-off to come to me
I stood near stagnant body of lass
I knocked the Earth with fury
I raised my fist with anguish –
eyes distressed filled with tears-
At last, my heart leaned on,

Murmuring– My soul, my body, my mind
‘Weaken heart, Murmuring mind
Painful nights, Tearful days’
You confer me all
And lay under the sun and shower
Run behind ripping clouds, deep of calm sea’
Grin with glittering stars
Stepping with gentle breeze

Tears drips, feelings flows,
And soul flies, and not finds a way
to clinch my mind,
your smile never dies
innocent eyes never close,

breath never end
Rising every time
when the wind breathe
When the flowers gathered die,
When the misty drops wets the sandy mud
My child, Your cause is the hope of the world,
In your fight is the life of the race
should build, in years passed by,

,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,Azad

DESERT RAIN

I feel so close to you
that it is hard to tell
where your heart ends
and where mine begins.

And you are like desert rain

It is like we are one,
Body, spirit and mind;
meant for each other
two of a kind.
and your are like desert rain

Like rain upon the desert,
On a dry and barren land;
You cause my soul to blossom,
With touch from gentle hands.

and you are like desert rain

And like the breeze of springtime,
Gently 'cross my body blows;
Igniting there a flame of fire,
That sets my heart aglow.

and you are like desert rain

You fill me up when I am empty

Like no one else has done;

Pour warmth into my spirit

Like rays from summer sun

and you are like desert rain

I love you so much

You love me too;

Together forever

Me and you

And you are like desert rain

Azad Tirur

Everywhere her Screaming ????????????

Society is something of a catch-all phrase for organized humanity. It's just another word for people. And just as there can be evil in people, there can also be evil in society. And evil, in any of its myriad guises, can only bring us pain and sadness. I wrote in memory of 9 year girl child who was brutally raped and killed recently in a remote village in Kerala India. Her, innocent, feared face, screaming, haunting me day and night…………what I do……….I cried alone…..and she is still crying with tiny stars and smirking moon……

There is pain in my heart for another.
I cannot comfort her,
I cannot be with her,
I want to share her pain,
ease her suffering,
show her I care,

She flew away but,
Why must it be so hard?
Why should it happen to start with?
The unanswerable questions
ring out to the stars,
and only silence replies
with it's smooth sound.
I scream with anguish,
and the pain of helplessness.
"There must be something

I can do, mustn’t there?"
her whimpered query
hangs in the air,
"please, please, please.. no ?".
and only silence replies

with it's smooth sound.
But only silence and time remain,
one a comforter,
the other, a healer.
So why am I not comforted,
or healed of my pain,
and only misery remains?

and only silence replies
with it's smooth sound.

I am in mute, feelings flows,

Tears flooded, heart leap up

Throat dried up, no sounding elegy

At last I fade and die,

And fly away other end,

to wipe out tears showing her tiny stars, and smirking moon,

and I scream again become

soundless elegy on faded bud and only silence replies
with it's smooth sound. -Azad

Dream and Truth

As you can imagine,

I see her in dreams

Last night, this morning,

Forever it seems

Her hair blowing softly,

In the slightest of gentle breeze

Her smile upturned,

I know she is a tease

Her eyes seem to sparkle,

Have a depth that is so deep

I know should I dwell,

Then my soul she would keep,

Her face is to me, as perfect can be,

Though she may not think so,

This all I can see…,

And her voice such a sweetness,

Only angels can have,

Does she realizes this power,

She will have all my life,

She is a vision in beauty,

A sight for my eyes,

She is all that I have dream of,

That I have wished

She is the one that I would love,

This vision I need

Someday sometime,

On this shall I dream?

Forever, ever… and ever………..

What I do with this idiot dream

Nothing, that I would do

open heart, mind and eyes

Look around the magic world

Screaming Iraq, Scrawling guns,

Weeping moms, the withered scarf’s

Hungry Kabul, Roaring guns,

Floating corpses, sobbing eyes,

The truth behind darkness,

Tears shed on crystal mind,

Broken into pieces,

It wets the golden sand

I lay without mind,

Cannot close my mind again

to see my angelic dream…

Never my dreams comes on to my eyes

Still tears fell on crystal mind...

Differ by dream and truth

Azad

THE FRANTIC WORLD & OLD SERPENT

Heinous Old Serpent

spew out the world

we look at the map of world

for a matter of that is not concern of mine

and I shall be asked,

why should I follow your fighting line

why should you drag us into war ?

Mortifying it was and it is,

the nakedness of war, savagery of swords,

brutality of guns we experienced in the past,

the nightmare in our memory pushes us into panic

The sanguinary of the bloody wars

Tears of Bosnian widows,

Corpses in Palestinian Soil,

The Bloodbath in Algeria

Blood spread soil of Kosovo,

Blood-spattered mud in Kabul

Carcasses of Hiroshima and Nagasaki,

Frying human flesh and Dying kids in Iraq

All at last Earth says the chronicle end in dark

We look at the dying earth and says,

the wonderful calmness we like,

cement of confidence we like

Not marching against liberty

But, are on foot behind liberty

We wish to avoid unlit sky

We wish to avoid the earth to moan

We wish to avoid the sky shedding black tears

We like the glittering sun and smiling moon

We like the stars shining brightly in the sky

We like the wind breathing slowly

We like gleeful earth and sky

And we love hearts that makes earth happy

But, The heinous Old Serpent

shoot out the world with weapons

I shall be asked,

looking at the map of world,

Why should I follow your fighting line?

Why should you drag me into war?

- AZAD   

IMBECILE ANIMAL

               Ravishing animal with veering hair

Bursting pot gut turned around gullet

Clown bovine animal wave ears

Beating pests on his trunk

annoying the valley growled

with the vexatious noise

Booby animal Strolled in grass field

biting bushes all around

with a foolish thinking

the sphery strongest

natury wisest

Foolish animal lowering head

To the pond thinking of drinking

Whole water in the pond

With a greedy look he drunken

More – More water in the trunk

Hard to raise his head – and

Hard to stand on his knee

Belly looks as an airship balloon

Laid on the waterfront

With a wink look senselessly

All other pests and animals

Mocking and singing

“I would be a donkey or Monkey

              More than being an animal

With senseless proud”

AZAD - Tirur

Behind the door hiding someone

Behind the door hiding someone

with thrashing mind beating heart

Behind dimness someone hiding

Probing tracing more or less

Found none in the evil dark

Rocking fear resounds in shadows

Roaming in darkness aware of

Someone leaning behind

Sense of fear dwell on mind

Kite in the air like flew

Roared with a keen look

Rush to the lock up door

But, faint, fail, at last

roaring-screaming

Realizing it is death the last follower

Realizing it is death the last follower

My yelp cry annoyed with no rejoinder

Realizing my flesh underway to decay

And become dome of mud-

Death murmured “enjoy beauty of last part, the closing

stages the moment of conclusion make you joy forever, enjoy”

Still fraught to head off from the darkness

laid down with closed eyes

for some other way to hide from culmination

AZAD - TIRUR

NARMADA- A GORY GIRDLE

Oh, this day is hiding behind
the dark shadow of midnight
Still Narmada flowing blandly
Glittering its tears in the evil of darkness

My eyes left in the lurch
On bank of Narmada
Sandy milky mud mature redden
Narmada flows as girdle to mom
Flows with thrashing heart
With glittering tears,

My eyes stone-still in the drained
Bosom of Narmada –
Whose sob I heard deserted me
And whose scream beached me
And whose corpse I saw withered
And whose scarf floating in water
And whose blood redden milky soil
Oh! Narmada- I am in mute
Still you gently flowing wiping
Tears of milky soil bank

Tarantulas tainted purity
Human Corpses floating along
Blood vessel flowing in tides
tears glittering in calm water front
Still, Narmada flows gently

Azad Tirur

I Cried alone in that rain

Years of silence burst out at once

After a long time I was on my village

The same place where I grow in sun and shower

where the first rain drops touched my feet

where the grass field I played

I stepped out from shell of memories

In few seconds I was all wet

Rain drops kissed my face

Starts melting heart & mind

And I cried alone in that rain

Confusion feeds like a savage inside,
Leaving nothing considered worthy remains
Destined to walk through life less ordinary
Alone, exiled, different and disdain

My heart moves from fire to cold

look like a helpless chick in the rain

As it started raining more heavily

The sound of thunder grooved

I could feel loneliness, wandering here and there

Looking for all that my pain can recognize

I couldn’t, my tears were all lost in the rain

I could feel burning on my cheeks,

When the cold rain drops feel on it,

Who knows what I look for

And my heart was in a pain,

I cried alone in that rain

Azad Tirur

HUMAN BEING

Centuries have gone by
And I am still lost in the spirals of sadness
I cry for the unknown
And fear the known
I regret what I have done
I fantasize what I fail to do,
I long for the one I never had,
Neglected the affection I receive,
In the conquest of conquering what is not distinct  to me
I kill all that is only mine
I always want what I never had
I overlook the beauties
Sight in my front eyes
Search for those far beyond the horizon
I am everything and get nothing
I understand the most just not my self
I am in search of me
I am the HUMAN BEING.

                        AZAD

The Desert Rain

I feel so close to you
that it is hard to tell
where your heart ends
and where mine begins.

And you are like desert rain

It is like we are one,
Body, spirit and mind;
meant for each other
two of a kind.
and you are like desert rain

I love you so much;
you love me too;
together forever
me and you.
and you are like desert rain

You fill me up when I am empty

Like no one else has done;

Pour warmth into my spirit

Like rays from summer sun

and you are like desert rain

Azad

A Bidding Day

Shaking day, brainy day

Grinding day, punching day

Rowing day, dismal day

Thirsty day, and hungry day,

Passage day, costing day

Lining day, Pricing day

Shouting day, counting day

Eager day, hammering day

Probing, tracing,

Calling, shouting,

Brew then as panic

Loom then as pant

We then as lambs

You then as lion

We then as asses

You then as fox

And all at last fried

And Dumping, throwing,

And are we saying submitting

With a dump look,

Standing in burial box,

a sigh of relief break of silence

Nor we slay any head

Nor we did any sin

Though do we also

Get a day of grimace

Azad

An IDIOT Mouse in An IDIOT World

I shall be telling this with a cry

Of seeing angriness glued to the glimmering in each eyes

Somewhere years hither and hence

Estimating my financial growth in the Kingdom

I chose to tell the lie & truth on my work place

I have filled in my last letter to boss
I've phone 'till my line caught fire

And I turned my wheel of memory

To the past risks of Ethic policy,

I remember every body Sighed,

Yearning for quill pens and papers
when the customer is in front
and computers had never been thought of
whereas now they rule alone.

Only a host of broken promises
That haunted then in-trays then
Took note, as they lay, of the last chance
To arrange the affairs of customers

'Is there anybody there?' said the customer
banging on the office front door

But no-one there descended to the customer
No head to raise from the keyboard,
Took heed of the phone, or the door knock
By computers all were fazed.

And a phone started up in the office
above the client's head
And he knock upon the door again, a second time
'Is there anybody there?' he said.

The poor client looking at the moving time, morning to the noon

Reading the big letters written in banner,

Integrity and ethical tone of employees

Staring & Mocking at the empty chairs

And thinking of the office timing

The poor client sensed impotence of work place
though his heart sank in unhappy,
And wandered, down the empty hall and disappeared

Like an idiot mouse in an idiot world,

I also chuckled with an idiot look

Stared at the idiot computer

Thinking of the banners of Integrity & Ethical tone

Yearned again for quill pen and paper

AZAD

Mothers Scream

Hear the mothers scream everywhere
Another atrocity with holocaust fears begins everywhere
In Rainbow colors Peace written everywhere
And doves are praying for all the mothers everywhere

Cry for their pain to be known to others
The nightmares of flames and destruction
And the grieve and agony they suffer
from the death of their born
And live their lives full of confusion

Mother’s tears fall like razor sharp
And the sky begs the sun to come out and wipe its tears
Drooping full of sadness and loneliness
And the unfaithful tears when they fall
And the embedded echoes of sorrows and woes

Their kids have forsaken them and have grown
And left them with empty arms… all alone
Rocks... gunfire...bloodshed
Tombs filled with their children...

They think of the days that kids were by their side
With warmth and love they cuddle up side by side
Reading bed time stories and talking of that day
Just as they enjoy the peacefulness of a full moon
While they sit on their porch rocking their fancy chair
Rocks... gunfire...bloodshed and the moment
many tears turn into blood

They looked up to the sky
and wished to be with their children
Then remembering their last child
Gazed desperately into the Horizon

Oh the world wake, hear the mother scream everywhere
Oh the world wake, hear the mother scream everywhere

Azad Tirur

Pain

Pain is what most try and avoid.
Pain is what makes people struggle.
Pain is what hurts physically.
But it hurts more mentally.

waking in pain and hurt
cutting in pain and hurt
bleeding in pain and hurt
crying in pain and hurt
I know nothing other then pain and hurt
I use drugs to end the pain and hurt
but all I get is pain and hurt
Is there nothing other then pain and hurt
In this painful and hurtful world?

Azad

Silence

And at the end now

All I have to offer
is solitude and silence.
No accomplishments to speak of,
having never finished anything

Worth finishing
except bad relationships
and good friendships
I now regret not keeping.

Those I feel closest to
are the farthest away from me
while I keep myself distant
from those who are near.

that a deep sleep in forefront

Without any disturbances

Let me sleep well and forget everything

Not yet time for good bye forever

But My friends, bye bye then now…….

                                             AZAD

                                                 

The Image

I stand in front of the mirror
And wipe the fog away
My vision is still hazy
From ridding myself this way

My hair is all in tangles
My eyes are filled with tears
I wipe the warm tears away
As if trying to rid myself of my fears

I'm ashamed of what I have done
But it hurts me even more
I can't make myself stop doing it
Even though I know what's in store

It has taken over my mind
It is eating away at my soul
My throat burns with anger
While my stomach growls even more

I am still looking in the mirror
Yet I don't know who I see
All that I know
Is this sad sight couldn't be me

I grip the edge of the counter
So tightly that my knuckles turn white
I want to scream out in anger
At this ugly sight
It's your fault I hiss
That I do this to myself
If only you didn't look this way
I would be in better health

I cover the image in the mirror
With the palm of my hand
And notice a cut on my finger
That I never knew I had

I grab my hand in anger
Or is it more like fright
I'm just so shocked
To see this sight

I laugh and then I cry
Then crumble to the floor
Suddenly aware of my problem
Like I never was before

How did this happen to me?
How did I become a statistic?
I thought that I was strong,
I thought I was better than that

My head throbs in anger
My throat burns with pain
My finger loses a drop of blood
And Nothing is what I have gained
Azad

Cries in the night
At a standstill of night
A lonely cry can be heard
As it echoes through line and space
I found no bounds
It has no prejudices
For a heart that is lonely
Has no home, no resting place
The lonely heart feels
Only the cold of winter
Yet seeks the warm solaced
Which seems as distant as?
the eclipse of the sun
It as though of a soul
Is crying out
For a life that is ending
And no yet begin
Common flayed inscribes
Worn on a made of face
Beauty of Inner soul
Does not a fallen tree makes a sound
In the forest when no one
Is around to hear
Stave not all heard
The sound of silence
Such is the ease
Of cries in the night
Walk with me
Hold my hand
Together let us walk into light
                     azad

The Dreamy Night and Misty dawn

Thousands of eyes keep

Observing obey at dawn

Break light of obedience

Obeying all the day

A bed where seeds born

And grow so tall

To stand and look-upon

The elegant world

What is this light source

Startling the seeds within

To awaken me ?

I can see my dreams very clear

To the tiny stars I cry

The stars in the air

They glow like in your eyes

And I shoot them with bombs.

Touching a heart through

Soft waves of chimera lights

Enchanting night thoughts

Solar in clouds

In Northern skies a glowing

Streams of colored

Wisp of moss green mist

Spiral dark silhouette trees

Exude mystic light

The black and white memories

Running through the mist

So was I Cannot see the day break

The new dawn awaits

Awaits beside me once more

With the night dreams

Leaving me with an yelp cry.

-Azad Tirur

blooming dale

I wish this poem were pixie dust

To through into your eyes

And make you see the loveliness

Beneath my sad disguise.

And I would take you in my arms

And weave a magic spell

That I could utter anytime

To make you love me well

But alas my simple words

Are like summer rain

That drums on hills and fields and hearts,

Then vanishes again

And though my love might make you bloom,

You turn with fragile grace

To gaze in aching loneliness

At someone else's face

We lust for what we cannot have,

A long, unbroken chain

Of lovers who remain unloved

And loved who love in vain

While I'm near mad with wanting you

As trees must have the sun,

You cannot help but find a love

Who loves another one.